To the mother that has to go back to work.
You may have been absent from work for a long time, but you’ve certainly had your hands full.
You, yes you, have brought a child in to the world. Granted, there was someone else to help you at the very beginning, but it was YOU who gave birth – or, if you’re like me, you’ve had your tummy sliced right open. Just for them.
If you put the child to feed on your breast, you’ve had the cracked and painful nipples. Sometimes you’ve had the teeth too…
If you fed the child on the bottle, you’ve spent endless hours washing and sterilising those pain in the arse bottles. Not to mention the scooping of the powder, and the constant temperature checking. It may be ok for you to drink cold tea, and slurp scalding tomato soup, but the baby’s milk has to be perfect.
You’ve been pee’d on and vomited on – almost daily.
You’ve been elbows deep, sometimes literally, in baby poo.
You’ve found baby poo in your hair… An hour after you changed the last dirty nappy. You don’t even know how it got there.
You know exactly when your washing machine will finish the load – because it seems to be on all of the time.
You’ve watched your child grow from a pure and innocent baby, who was so delicate, to a smiling, laughing, possibly crawling, and maybe even standing, ‘not quite a toddler’ child.
But alas, you have reached that time where you can no longer put it off. You’re venturing in to worlds anew – even if you’ve been there before.
You’ve made the hard decision to leave your child behind and go back to work. Afterall, you need the money, right? You need your career, right?
But don’t think of it like that. Think of it as a new beginning.
You are going to miss your child. You are going to constantly wonder if you made the right choice to return to work. You are going to cry every now and again… Afterall… You’re leaving behind that pure and innocent baby behind…
But you will be ok.
It is ok to cry.
It is ok to miss your child.
It is ok to wonder if you made the right decision.
Just remember that at the end of your working day, you have those beautiful smiles to go home to. Those cuddles, that you now take for granted, are going to be cherished even more. Bedtimes may still be a struggle – especially if you have one of those children (like mine) who doesn’t like to go to bed – but you will love the effort you have to put in.
Because that’s your child, and even though you are away from them the whole day, you know they are there, waiting for you when you get home.
From a mother who’s been there before x