Not bad considering I haven’t picked up the pipes in 12 months…
- Read more. Aim to read at least one book per month. If you start a book, finish it. Even if you don’t like it…
- Write more. You have such a creative mind, and you’re letting it go to waste. Write at least one piece of poetry, and one short-story per month. Get in to the habit of writing, then when you feel more confident, start writing that book…
- Every night, write a bullet point list containing three things that you are grateful for on that day.
- Teach Gning how to play chess and backgammon. At least once a month, play a game of each.
- Start keeping the house. Properly. No more “I’ll do it in a minute…” – if it needs doing, do it now. Stop leaving everything until later – it’ll only pile up, and mean more work for you.
Today is the last day of 2017.
It’s been a rather eventful year, and one that I can actually say, hasn’t been a bad one. Granted, there have been several ups and downs, but this year has been one of the better ones, over the past few.
A few reflections of 2017…
- Gning started year one in school.
- Donut started nursery.
- I finished working at the DWP – one of the hardest, yet satisfying decisions of my life.
- The hubby started full-time work.
- Donuts’ speech is coming along beautifully.
- Gning passed his “Stage 1” in swimming.
- My depression seems to have stabilised somewhat, and I’m relying less and less on my medication.
- I have restarted the old way of communicating, in “penpalling” (good old fashioned pens, paper, envelopes and stamps).
- I made a new, very dear friend.
When I was younger, I used to always make resolutions for the upcoming new year, however, as more than likely everyone else, they never usually lasted longer than a week or two.
For 2018, however, I have decided on a couple…
- Read more. I would like to read at least one book per calendar month.
- Write more. Not letters, but write more poetry, and short stories – just like I used to “pre-children”.
So, without further ado, I bid thee farewell 2017, and 2018, I welcome you with open arms.
This year, no matter how much I try, I just can’t get in to the Christmas Spirit.
It’s like it’s not even December.
It’s cold outside, and our heating is on. I have a beautiful new pair of winter boots that hubby has bought for me (early birthday present). I’ve been wearing my lovely, grey, winter coat and scarf. Homemade, paper decorations are sprawled across our house – paper snowflakes, stars and chains. There are several Christmas cards on our window-ledge, and we’ve got a beautiful, wooden winter scene on display, that my dad made…
However, we didn’t have the tree up.
It’s become a tradition, in our house, that our tree and decorations go up on 1 December; but it wasn’t possible, as there was just too much to do in the house. There was still cleaning to be done, mainly due to a couple of mishaps in the boys room a few weeks ago (long story).
A couple of days came and went, and Gning was questioning why we haven’t got our tree up. So on 4 December, hubby got the step-ladder out, and up in to the attic he went.
He passed the attic door to me, and then I heard him say, “looks like we’ve got mice… There’s droppings everywhere”.
He passed the large, red bag, containing the tree down to me… “Be careful,” he said to me, “looks like they’ve eaten this…” Hubby then handed me a couple of our Christmas stockings, which also had decorations in them, but it looks like the mice had got to them too.
Everything was either chewed, or had droppings on. The tree bag was slightly damp, and had fresh droppings on it. It made me worried to open it in the house, so we carefully carried everything out to the driveway, where we keep our wheelie-bins.
Very little was salvageable. Thankfully, I managed to save a few of my special decorations that I had been collecting over the years. They needed a bloody good wash, but were still able to be used. So this left us with a handful of baubles, and a single set of fairy lights.
So it was decided. We had no choice but to buy a new tree and decorations, and we found them in our local Asda (otherwise known as Wal-mart).
As soon as we got home, we unpacked everything and started to decorate. Gning and Donut helped the hubby with the new baubles, and they had a great time in doing so.
Granted, our new 5ft tree wasn’t the 7ft tree we were used to, but it is still lovely all the same. I love it! It’s super cute, and fits in to the corner nicely.
We’ve still got a few things that we need to buy, but at least we have our tree up!
As for the mice, well, I’m afraid there’s not going to be any good news for them.
Normally I’m tolerant of mice. I like them. They’re so small, and they need to live freely, but I have a different rule when they’re in the house. And they are. They’re living comfortably, up in my attic, and I don’t want to take the chance of them coming down, actually in to the house. I’m currently pricing up traps… Not the old ones, that snap and kill (I couldn’t cope with that), but one of the box things…
Sorry Mickey, Minnie, Mighty and Jerry – you’re about to be evicted.
I’ve just been sorting out my external hard-drive, and I’ve come across this selection of photo’s. All of which were taken by Gning when he was just 4 years old… Looking at these, I can honestly say that some of these shots could have been taken by a professional photographer, with decades of experience! None have been edited in any way.
So in my opinion… Give your 4 year old a camera. Some of the shots can be amazing ❤
It’s a late one, but we’ve just told Gning to pack up, and get to bed, as he needs to be up early for school. As usual, it doesn’t take him long to start playing up and getting upset, but this was different. He suddenly became inconsolable.
I made him come and sit beside me, on the settee in the front room. I eventually managed to get him to start talking…
“Today has been the worst day of my life…”
I thought he was just playing up again, and I replied, “you’re only 6 sweetheart. If you think today’s been the worst of your life, God help you when you’re older…”
He starts blubbing even more, and then starts to tell me that everyone doesn’t believe him, when he tells them that he went to Disney World, Florida, in the October half term holidays.
I sympathise with him. I’ve been in his shoes, and he’s walking in mine right now.
When I was growing up, I was one of the lucky kids, whose parents had money. My parents would jet off to all sorts of luxurious holidays around the globe (Egypt, Tunisia, Kenya, Mexico, Hong Kong, Bali…), and whenever I used to tell my (so-called) friends in school where I had been, they used to say I was lying.
It got to a point where even a teacher said I was lying – that there was no chance I had visited all of these countries…
I was labelled a liar, and that was that. It didn’t matter how much proof I took in to school (photo’s), they were obviously faked.
So back to yesterday.
Gning tells me that there’s one boy in his class who is constantly calling him out. He’s determined to prove to everyone that Gning is lying, and that he is better.
Then it happened. The moment no parent should experience. It only took two seconds, but right there – right then, I actually heard my heart smash.
“I’ll just kill myself…”
Yeah. He said it. My 6 year old “miracle baby” just told me that he would kill himself.
I tried my best to stay calm. I grabbed him, and I held him tight. The tears started… I didn’t let go. I held him against my chest for what must have been only minutes, but it seemed like hours.
I told him to go and get a tissue, to wipe his nose, and I went in to my bedroom.
Hubby was dozing off, as he has to be up at ridiculous o-clock for work. I closed the door slightly behind me, and I said “I need your help”. I tried to stay collected, and I told him what had just happened. I broke again when I reiterated the words… “He said that he’ll kill himself…”. Hubby was cool. He listened to what I had to say, then he got up.
Next thing you know, Hubby and Gning were both going in to my bedroom, and Hubby was cuddling him in the “big bed”.
I can’t have been that long when Gning came out. He had stopped crying, and seemed calmer – and somewhat happier. I told him that even though it was really late (it was about 11:30pm now), that he could put his TV on whilst he went to sleep.
Hubby closely followed, and brought me up to speed.
I had a job to do, and I needed to do it without hesitation. I needed to bypass Gnings’ teacher (which I had already tried speaking to in the past), and go straight to the headmaster.
This morning, I dropped Donut off at nursery, and walked Gning over to school. He went in with little hesitation. I then crossed the road, to the head office, and asked to speak to the headteacher. I was informed that she was in meetings all morning, but they would contact me as soon as they had spoken to her, to arrange an appointment for me to go in and speak to her, face to face.
My appointment is tomorrow. 3:15pm. 15 minutes before Gning finishes school.
Fingers crossed, everyone, this is going to be tough.
On 29 September, I had horrific abdominal pains, and I was almost calling NHS 111 for advice. I had the pains, cold sweats, and was feeling incredibly nauseous. Anyway, the pain went away, I went to bed, and I thought nothing of it. The following day I had another slight “attack”, but subsided within 20 minutes.
12 October 2017, at 9pm, I had the start of a stomach ache again. I thought I had just eaten too much (pasta bolognaise and garlic bread…) I was in bed for 10pm, to try to sleep it off.
Hubby left for work for 1.20am (ish), going in to 13 October, and even though he didn’t intend to – his leaving disturbed me… Either that, or the pain woke me up, coinciding with him leaving.
Sweats, pain, nausea again… 2.10am, I call NHS 111. After a telephone triage, they decide that they need to send an ambulance – to check me over.
Next thing you know, hubby is home from work, and I’m in the back of the ambulance, on the way to A&E.
Several blood and urine tests, stomach and chest x-rays, and ecg’s later, the pain has subsided enough for me to be discharged, with the diagnosis that it’s more than likely my gallbladder / gallstones.
I’m now expecting a letter from my GP with an appointment for an ultrasound, so they can closer examine my gallbladder. This may mean an operation is on the cards…